alok nath
alok nath
honey singh blue eyes
Teacher :- iska arth (meaning) bataiye..
.
Blue Eyes Hypnotyes Teri Kardi
Hai Mainu I Swear Chhoti Dress Me Bomb Lagdi
Mainu...
.
.
Student :- prasang me ye panktiya hamari
pathya pustak "Yo Yo Honey Singh" me sankalit
Kavita
'BlueEyes' se li gayi hai...
.
Jiske rachaita "Shree Yo Yo Honey Singh ji"
hai...
...
Is Mein kavi kehna chahate hai...
Hey Balika..!
° °
Teri neeli ankhe mujhe sammohit karti hai..
Mujhe vishwaas hai ki...
Tu in chhoti vastro mein
Visphotak samagri k samaan lagti hai....!!
kashmir troll
Heyyy! Bilawal Bhutto,
Hawaa Mango ge Aandhi Denge,
Kashmir Mango ge Rahul Gandhi Denge..
bollywood whatsapp chat
Bollywood's WhatsApp group. ...
Akshay- hii everyone..!!
Shahid- Hi overacting ki dukaan
Akshay-
Saif-
Kareena- Hii Saifu......love u
*Shahid left group*
Bipasha- hahaha....bechara......how r u frnds??
John- hey m fine....miss u....how's u??
*Bipasha left group*
Akshay- arey yr bhot boring ho rha hai...😑
Ajay- kyun? Tees Mar khan dekhi kya?
Akshay- nhi... teri Himmatwala dekhi
*Ajay was removed from group*
Aishwarya- Nice to meet u all. ..thnx for adding in the grp
Salman- Miss to hmne bhi bohot kiya aapko
Aishwarya- Hii....who r u??
Salman-
Akshay - Kya sallu bhai...bhot emotional ho rhe ho
*Aishwarya left group *
Salman-
Vivek- Kon hai tu? Kyon ro rha hai?
Salman- Mujh par ek ehsaan krna ki Mujh par koi ehsaan mat krna...
*Vivek left group *
Amitabh- Hahaha.....arey Akki hmare zamane ke actors hein ki nhi iss grp me???😇😇
Akshay- Haan hai na...Rekha ji hein..
*Amitabh left group *
Chunky- Bas karo yr....sab grp Kyon chhod rhe hai??😦😦
Saif- Chunky ko kaun add kiya??
Chunky- Arey me bhi Bangladesh ka superstar hu...
Salman- 😛😛😛😛
Govinda- Aap sabko Govinda ka namaskar..
Shakti kapoor- Aaau....mere raja babu.. apko bhi namaskar😇😇
*Shakti kapoor was removed from group *
Shahrukh- Kyon nikala usko grp se
Akshay- Sry...glti se add hua.....vulgar members not allowed
Salman- Shahrukh ko Kyon add kiya??
Shahrukh- Tera kya ja rha he??
Salman- Sahi se reh nhi to maar khayega
Shahrukh- Jyada natak mar kr
Akshay- Ladai bndh kro wrna dono ko grp se bahr nikaal dunga
Suniel Shetty- Akki bhai...Hera-pheri 3 ki shooting kb shuru hogi??😟😟
Akshay- Tjhe liya he kya film mein..
Suniel Shetty-
Hritik- Hii Anna....ajkal filmo me dikhai nhi dete...
Suniel Shetty- Jabse Krrish dekhi he filmo me kaam krne ka man hi nhi krta. .
Madhuri- Hello frnds....meri comebck film Gulaabi gang jaroor dekhna...
Juhi Chawla- Yes frnds..zaroor dekhna...mein bhi hu
Alia bhatt- Haha...koi nhi dekhega
Raveena- Akki...bacchiyon ko kyon add kiya grp me
Sunny leone- Only adults allowed😗😗
Saif- Oye sunny leone bhi hai kya?
Kareena-
*Kareena left group *
*Sunny leone was removed from group *
*Sunny deol added in group *
Akshay- Hii dhai kilo wale haath
Sunny deol- Oyyeeeeeeee..!!. Action hero se mjak?..fod dunga..
Suniel Shetty- Mein hun action hero
Akshay- Mein hun..
Salman- Action ka dusra naam Salman Khan😎
John- I m the real action hero..
Rajnikant- Munna.......jhund me toh suvar aate hai...sher akela adata hai..!!😈😎😎
John- kaun tu???
Sunny- kaun hai ye akki? Batana,
Akshay- Rajnikant Sir..😎
* Sunny deol left group *
*Hritik left group *
*John left group *
*Saif left group *
*Salman left group *
*Shahrukh left group *
*Suniel Shetty left group *
😎 Yenna Raskala...Mind it..!!😎
set max
Set Max Will Keep Airing 'SooryaVansham' Until The Last Living Person On Earth Has Seen It.!!
teacher nd student
Teacher says,
Agar apna
character acha
karna chahte ho to
apni har teacher ko
maa samjho
.
Student :
per miss is se hamary papa ka character kharab ho jayega.
Agar apna
character acha
karna chahte ho to
apni har teacher ko
maa samjho
.
Student :
per miss is se hamary papa ka character kharab ho jayega.
EXAMS
600 Pages ki buk ko kitne din main padha ja skta hai..
WRITER-6 months
DOCTOR-2months
LAWYER-1month
STUDENT- pehle ye batao exam kab ha.
WRITER-6 months
DOCTOR-2months
LAWYER-1month
STUDENT- pehle ye batao exam kab ha.
SCHOOL
School ka wo Last day .......
.
.
.
.
jab sari ladkiya Saree me aati
hai.........
.
.
..
.
.
.
.
We all have a feeling k sala ye bhi
Itni
Sunder hai......
School dress me pata hi nahi
chala yaar........
.
.
.
.
jab sari ladkiya Saree me aati
hai.........
.
.
..
.
.
.
.
We all have a feeling k sala ye bhi
Itni
Sunder hai......
School dress me pata hi nahi
chala yaar........
fb
Facebook pe pehli chat
Ladka: tumhaara naam kya hai?
Ladki: Asha
Ladka: tum Asha ho, par Choti to nai ho?
Ladki: Matlab????
Ladka: Dil hai Chota sa, Choti si Asha...
"PERMANENTLY BLOCKED FOR LIFE"
Ladka: tumhaara naam kya hai?
Ladki: Asha
Ladka: tum Asha ho, par Choti to nai ho?
Ladki: Matlab????
Ladka: Dil hai Chota sa, Choti si Asha...
"PERMANENTLY BLOCKED FOR LIFE"
coke
1 ladki coke pi rahi thi,
achanak us me se 1 MACHHAR nikla Macchar bola : MAA.
Ladki:Mein teri maa nahi hu.
Machhar:Aisa na bol maa,
mein teri COKE se nikla hoon.......
achanak us me se 1 MACHHAR nikla Macchar bola : MAA.
Ladki:Mein teri maa nahi hu.
Machhar:Aisa na bol maa,
mein teri COKE se nikla hoon.......
boy and girl
Do ladke do ladkiyo ka peecha kar rahe the, rakshabandhan ka din tha
.
.
.
.
Ladkiya shop me ghusi aur do rakhi khareedi aur dono ko bandh kar boli happy rakshabandhan bhaiya
.
.
.
Ladko ne ek dusre ko kaha..
'chal koi nae yaar to meri behen se shaadi kar le mai teri behen se kar leta hoo'
.
.
Boyzz rocked
Grlzz shocked
.
.
.
.
Ladkiya shop me ghusi aur do rakhi khareedi aur dono ko bandh kar boli happy rakshabandhan bhaiya
.
.
.
Ladko ne ek dusre ko kaha..
'chal koi nae yaar to meri behen se shaadi kar le mai teri behen se kar leta hoo'
.
.
Boyzz rocked
Grlzz shocked
husband wife
WIFE:" Aaj to 5 rupey ke 3 pyaj mil gaye..
HUSBAND (Excited):" Wo kaise??
.
.
WIFE:" 5 rupey ka 1 usne diya,
1 mai utha ke bhag gayi,
aur
.
.
.
.
1 usne mujhe fek ke mara.. to wo bhi utha layi .
HUSBAND (Excited):" Wo kaise??
.
.
WIFE:" 5 rupey ka 1 usne diya,
1 mai utha ke bhag gayi,
aur
.
.
.
.
1 usne mujhe fek ke mara.. to wo bhi utha layi .
lol
This is killer one !
Husband comes home early and sees wife with
another guy.
Wife: Why did you Come early?
Husband: Who is he?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Wife: Don't try to change the topic..!
Husband comes home early and sees wife with
another guy.
Wife: Why did you Come early?
Husband: Who is he?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Wife: Don't try to change the topic..!
santa
Santa Was Kissing A Blank Paper.
Banta:
Ye Kya Hai?
Santa:
Mri Girlfriend Ka Love Letter Hai.
Banta:
Magar Ye Toh Khali Hai yar,
Santa:
Aaj-kal Hum baat nahin karte.
Banta:
Ye Kya Hai?
Santa:
Mri Girlfriend Ka Love Letter Hai.
Banta:
Magar Ye Toh Khali Hai yar,
Santa:
Aaj-kal Hum baat nahin karte.
exams troll
80% of the final exam will be based on the one lecture you missed and the one book you didn’t read.
exams
If You Dont Know The Answers In An Exam Just Put Lines Like This
||||||||||
& Write Below Scratch Here For Answer =P =D
||||||||||
& Write Below Scratch Here For Answer =P =D
lolz
Santa ne kirayedaar ko mkaan dikhaya or bola:
Rs
500 kiraya hoga.
.
.
.
kirayedaar: Thik hai.
.
Lekin aapke ghar me
chuhey nach rahe hai. .
.
.
.
Santa: To saale 500 me kya
Sheela nachegi?
Rs
500 kiraya hoga.
.
.
.
kirayedaar: Thik hai.
.
Lekin aapke ghar me
chuhey nach rahe hai. .
.
.
.
Santa: To saale 500 me kya
Sheela nachegi?
bollywood troll
Pappu:" bhagwan meri shadi katrina se kara do.._/\_
.
.
Bhagwan:" Uski ek saree 1 lac ki hai, tu kharcha kar payega.. ??
.
.
Pappu:" Koi upay bhagvan
.
.
Bhagvaan:" Mallika Sherawat..
.
.
Bhagwan:" Uski ek saree 1 lac ki hai, tu kharcha kar payega.. ??
.
.
Pappu:" Koi upay bhagvan
.
.
Bhagvaan:" Mallika Sherawat..
santa
Santa was inserting dogs tail into pipe
Banta Oye bevwoof, kutte ki dum kabhi seedhi nahi hoti
Santa Idiot main to pipe bend kar raha hoon
Banta Oye bevwoof, kutte ki dum kabhi seedhi nahi hoti
Santa Idiot main to pipe bend kar raha hoon
lol
Intelligent Pappu
.
.
.
.
Teacher :"Ye batao ki Duniya mei kitne desh
hai ???
.
.
.
.
. .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Pappu :"Kar di na pagalon wali
baat
Duniya mei 1 hi desh hai
INDIA
Baki sab to videsh hai.
.
.
.
.
Teacher :"Ye batao ki Duniya mei kitne desh
hai ???
.
.
.
.
. .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Pappu :"Kar di na pagalon wali
baat
Duniya mei 1 hi desh hai
INDIA
Baki sab to videsh hai.
GIRL AND BOY
GIRL : Send me Funny MessaGes.
.
.
.
BOY :Sorry i am Busy,
Study Kar Raha hun,
.
.
.
GIRL : hahahahahahahah
Bas aise hi 3-4 aur karde.....
.
.
.
BOY :Sorry i am Busy,
Study Kar Raha hun,
.
.
.
GIRL : hahahahahahahah
Bas aise hi 3-4 aur karde.....
DRUNK MAN
I Got so Drunk Last Night ,
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
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.
.
I Walked Across the Dance Floor to Get Another Drink, and I Won the DANCE COMPETITION...!!
.
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.
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.
I Walked Across the Dance Floor to Get Another Drink, and I Won the DANCE COMPETITION...!!
PINKU AND MASTER
Master to pinku - beta agar do mein se do gye to kitne rhe?
.
Pinku- samjh mein nhi aya master g.
.
Master- beta tumare pas 2roti hai, tumne 2 roti khali, tumare pas kya bacha?
.
.
.
.
Pinku-sabji
.
Pinku- samjh mein nhi aya master g.
.
Master- beta tumare pas 2roti hai, tumne 2 roti khali, tumare pas kya bacha?
.
.
.
.
Pinku-sabji
rahul gandhi
Rahul Gandhi- I am so talented,
I became Congrees vice-
president. -yuhu!!!
.
.
Papu - Rahul ji, mujhe swimming
nahi aati...ek baar main apni
mummy aur apne kuchh doston ke sath ghumne
gaya
tha...wahan main aur mere dost
talab me nahane lage...
achchank hum sab dubne
lage...mere dost doob gaye par
main itna talented hoon kibach gaya
.
.
Rahul- Ghanta talent...tumhari
mummy ne tumhe bachayahoga
.
.
Papu - My point Exactly..!
I became Congrees vice-
president. -yuhu!!!
.
.
Papu - Rahul ji, mujhe swimming
nahi aati...ek baar main apni
mummy aur apne kuchh doston ke sath ghumne
gaya
tha...wahan main aur mere dost
talab me nahane lage...
achchank hum sab dubne
lage...mere dost doob gaye par
main itna talented hoon kibach gaya
.
.
Rahul- Ghanta talent...tumhari
mummy ne tumhe bachayahoga
.
.
Papu - My point Exactly..!
lol
What is love??
.
.
In France: is a comedy.
.
.
In England: is tragedy.
.
.
In Italy: is a wounder.
.
.
In germany: is a drama.
.
.
But,
.
.
.
.
In india:
.
.
.
.
.
Ek national game jo aajkal sab khelte hai..
.
.
In France: is a comedy.
.
.
In England: is tragedy.
.
.
In Italy: is a wounder.
.
.
In germany: is a drama.
.
.
But,
.
.
.
.
In india:
.
.
.
.
.
Ek national game jo aajkal sab khelte hai..
girl and boy
Girl : Cigarette peena chodd do
.
Boy : Chodd diya
.
Girl : Beer peena bi chodddo
.
Boy : Chodd diya
.
Girl : Good Aaj se roz subah
shaam Mandir jana shurukaro
.
Boy : Theek hai Aaj se roz
Mandir jana shuru
.
Girl : Haayee Jaanu So Sweet,
Mujse shaadi karoge?
.
.
Boy : Nahin
.
Girl : Kyun
.
.
Boy : Itna sudhar gaya hu, Ab
tumse achi koi mil jayegi B-):p
.
Boy : Chodd diya
.
Girl : Beer peena bi chodddo
.
Boy : Chodd diya
.
Girl : Good Aaj se roz subah
shaam Mandir jana shurukaro
.
Boy : Theek hai Aaj se roz
Mandir jana shuru
.
Girl : Haayee Jaanu So Sweet,
Mujse shaadi karoge?
.
.
Boy : Nahin
.
Girl : Kyun
.
.
Boy : Itna sudhar gaya hu, Ab
tumse achi koi mil jayegi B-):p
rahul gandhi
Rahul Gandhi was asked what India is doing to help in the search of the missing Malaysia Airlines flight MH370.
.
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.
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.
.
He said, 'We're investigating how a Malaysia airline plane had a Maharashtra registration number.
.
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.
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.
.
He said, 'We're investigating how a Malaysia airline plane had a Maharashtra registration number.
man and wife
A man puts a notice in front of his residence:
FOR SALE
Computer and Encyclopedia both in good
condition.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Reason for selling: No longer needed. Got
married.
Wife knows EVERYTHING ...
with backup disk called
Mother In Law
FOR SALE
Computer and Encyclopedia both in good
condition.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Reason for selling: No longer needed. Got
married.
Wife knows EVERYTHING ...
with backup disk called
Mother In Law
summer
It's not summer until you don't see "aaya mausam thande thande dermi cool ka" advertisement on TV
india
"Beta IIM se padho"
"Uncle IIM ka full form batana ?"
"Mera matlab MBA karo"
"MBA ka full form batana ?"
"Arre, mera matlab bade admi bano!"
Indian Society in a nut shell (._.')
"Uncle IIM ka full form batana ?"
"Mera matlab MBA karo"
"MBA ka full form batana ?"
"Arre, mera matlab bade admi bano!"
Indian Society in a nut shell (._.')
news channel
Muje to News Channal Wali aunti se dar lagta
hai
Kehti Hai . . . .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Jo Sab Chupatay Hain,Wo Hum Dikhate
Hain..Tauba .. Tauba”
If u Knw wht i mean
hai
Kehti Hai . . . .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Jo Sab Chupatay Hain,Wo Hum Dikhate
Hain..Tauba .. Tauba”
If u Knw wht i mean
dealing
Heights Of Talent.. xD
.
.
Dad: I want u 2 marry a girl of my choice.
Son: No
..
Dad: The girl is Bill Gates'daughter.
.Son: Then ok
.
.
Dad goes 2 Bill Gates
Dad: I want ur daughter 2 marry my son.
Bill Gates: No
..
Dad: My son is d CEO of the World Bank.
Bill Gates: Then ok
.
.
Dad goes 2 the President of the World Bank..
Dad: Apoint my son as the CEO of ur bank.
President: No!
..
Dad: He is the son-in-law of Bill Gates.
President: Then ok! |B
.
.
Dad: I want u 2 marry a girl of my choice.
Son: No
..
Dad: The girl is Bill Gates'daughter.
.Son: Then ok
.
.
Dad goes 2 Bill Gates
Dad: I want ur daughter 2 marry my son.
Bill Gates: No
..
Dad: My son is d CEO of the World Bank.
Bill Gates: Then ok
.
.
Dad goes 2 the President of the World Bank..
Dad: Apoint my son as the CEO of ur bank.
President: No!
..
Dad: He is the son-in-law of Bill Gates.
President: Then ok! |B
aashiqui 2
Pappu Aashiqui 2 dekh kar
aaya...
aur apni GF se Bola:" Sun Rahi
Hai Na Tu...:'((
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Breakup kar rha hu mai...
..
warna saala mai bhi pee, peeke
mar jaunga..
aaya...
aur apni GF se Bola:" Sun Rahi
Hai Na Tu...:'((
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Breakup kar rha hu mai...
..
warna saala mai bhi pee, peeke
mar jaunga..
girl
Girl:"If you will try to kiss me main shor macha
dungi
.
.
Boy:"Lekin yahan to door tak koi nahi hai..
.
.
.
.
Girl:"I know per formality to karni hi
padegi.. :O:D
dungi
.
.
Boy:"Lekin yahan to door tak koi nahi hai..
.
.
.
.
Girl:"I know per formality to karni hi
padegi.. :O:D
budha
Ek Budha Ek ladki se Takraya....
.
.
Budha:"Sorry...
.
.
Ladki:"Andha hai
kya...Dikhta nahi..
Ladki Jaise hi Aage badhi,
Ek handsome ladka us ladki se
takra gaya...
.
.
Ladka:"Sorry...
.
.
Ladki:"It's okay..
..
Budha ladki se bolta hai"MERI
SORRY KI SPELLING GALAT THI
KYA.. ??":p:O
.
.
Budha:"Sorry...
.
.
Ladki:"Andha hai
kya...Dikhta nahi..
Ladki Jaise hi Aage badhi,
Ek handsome ladka us ladki se
takra gaya...
.
.
Ladka:"Sorry...
.
.
Ladki:"It's okay..
..
Budha ladki se bolta hai"MERI
SORRY KI SPELLING GALAT THI
KYA.. ??":p:O
woodland
Boy :"Mein tumse bahat pyar krta
hu
..
Reh nhi skta tumhare bina
.
.
Girl :"Mere piche apni zindagi
barbad mat kar
.
.
Boy :"Q ?
. .
Girl :"Is raste pe patthr or kanto k
alwa kuch nhi
.
.
Boy :"Are pagli... tu tension na le
Mere pas WOODLAND k shoes hai bs
tu pat ja
hu
..
Reh nhi skta tumhare bina
.
.
Girl :"Mere piche apni zindagi
barbad mat kar
.
.
Boy :"Q ?
. .
Girl :"Is raste pe patthr or kanto k
alwa kuch nhi
.
.
Boy :"Are pagli... tu tension na le
Mere pas WOODLAND k shoes hai bs
tu pat ja
arvind kejriwal
Arvind Kejriwal can do anything to get attention of media..He's cursing MODI on his development model..
Those who still supports Kejriwal deserves a grand salute..."ofcourse by my mid finger"..
Those who still supports Kejriwal deserves a grand salute..."ofcourse by my mid finger"..
aasaram bapu joke
Teacher: Define
Aasaram Bapu?
Student:
Din me Hari Om,
Rat me Cond Om.
Din me Agrbatti,
Rat me Zabrdsti.
Din me Puja or Arti,
Rat me Vidya or Bharti.
Din me Swaha,
Rat me Aahaa!
Aasaram Bapu?
Student:
Din me Hari Om,
Rat me Cond Om.
Din me Agrbatti,
Rat me Zabrdsti.
Din me Puja or Arti,
Rat me Vidya or Bharti.
Din me Swaha,
Rat me Aahaa!
collage life
collage and school me ladkiyo ko char name se jana jata hai
Meri Bhabhi
or
#teribhabhi ya fir
meri wali
or
teri wali
Meri Bhabhi
or
#teribhabhi ya fir
meri wali
or
teri wali
medical troll
1 medical student ne apni
classmate
ko,
khoon se love-letter likh kar
diya..........
.
.
.
aur kaha :- mujhe iska jawab
jaroor
dena
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Ladki :- tumhara blood group
B+ hai
&iron ki kami hai..
classmate
ko,
khoon se love-letter likh kar
diya..........
.
.
.
aur kaha :- mujhe iska jawab
jaroor
dena
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Ladki :- tumhara blood group
B+ hai
&iron ki kami hai..
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